Sometimes Your Lack of Appetite may be from Low Blood Sugar

Starvation is terrible. You would rather die.

I haven't eaten much in days. It's hard to explain why I can't or don't feel like eating. I don't think it is nausea. It is this feeling in your mouth where you get tired of tasting. Before, I would still be able to eat a small meal. This weekend up until now, just thinking about putting anything in my mouth makes me gag, even a toothbrush and water.

Yesterday, I was able to recover some appetite by eating Cheerios and grapes all day. I was able to eat a full dinner. It's not much, but it's a good idea to eat whatever you can even if it is bad for you or not enough.

Sometimes it's just really hard to start doing anything, like exercise. But when you start, it feels so good. I knew I wasn't eating because my blood sugar was low. In order to raise it, I had to eat which I was having trouble with. Your body always go through such a vicious cycle. I kept thinking to myself, "If only I can coat my stomach lining or just start with glucose".

I woke up this morning feeling horrible. The first thought that came to mind was "I need some glucose". Yes, I know I'm such a nerd for knowing that. I ended up having two pieces of candy to help me drive to work. Then I had some milk tea (made with sweetened condensed milk) and munched on grapes all day. I always end my day with a cup of green tea. OMG! Somehow it had the power to flush out my system. I was eating everything in sight, including my coworker's leftover lunch. Why didn't I think of this sooner!

After work, I went to get my blood test. I was doing so well with all my blood counts recently. When I saw that my hemoglobin plummeted down to 7.9, I was surprised. Everything else dropped too. I asked the nurse if she read it wrong because it was at 9.7 just this past Saturday. It must be the "not eating" or the acupuncture. (I skipped last week's session.)

When I got home, my dad left me a big can of pure glucose. Just what I needed! I did not even know pure glucose existed. I am so happy! One tablespoon provided me with enough energy to start eating everything in sight.

Food is essential for the body. It may not seem very hazardous but it can cause dire consequences like brain damage from lack of energy. When you are having trouble eating, everything is a compromise. Don't just eat salad if you are not up for it. Eat some chips if that is all you can hold down. I promise you you will love yourself.

Do You Have Your Insurance Info with You?..I'm sorry, I have none. :(

As if you weren't sick enough, the insurance system stresses you out even more..and everyone knows stress makes you sicker...and because you are sicker, they have more reason to deny you coverage!!

I would say 80% of my stress comes from dealing with insurance and figuring out how to pay for all the treatments and doctor visits.

Nobody mentioned the importance of medical coverage, nor the difficulty of getting coverage. My parents didn't believe in medical insurance. My parents, my sister, and me hardly got sick/injured enough to use up the annual deductible. Along with career ed, driver's ed, and health ed in high school, they need an "everything you need to deal with in life" ed. (I'll think of something catchier later.)

For part of my teenage years, the city offered health insurance for low-income families. I was covered under that until they cut me off when I went to college. That was the end of my insurance coverage. Good thing I didn't need much coverage while at school.

After graduation, I interned at a winery. When that was over, I landed a temporary position at a pharmaceutical company. I must be delusional or something. I miscounted the zeroes and bought the wrong benefit package. It was useful until I maxed on my annual limit within 2 months from the first use. :(

Since then I've been having trouble getting coverage and paying medical bills. I am SO glad there is a law that states that they cannot refuse you treatment even if you can't pay. (I'll look up the exact wording later.)

I know all about Medi-Cal. I wish it was that easy to become eligible.

Introduction

Wow. There's so much I want to share with you but I don't know where to start. Ever since I've started battling my disease, I've learned so much -- about the insurance system, myself, humanity in general, the science of hematopoeisis.

I've been trying to get this blog started to share support and receive support. I'm really a private person. It's not until recently that I've decided to "come out". It is still hard to talk about it if I had to start the conversation.

I hope you all learn something and take something out of this.